"You got it all wrong. Yes, I was thnkng abt it just nw, not in a sense of serious break, but i knw u realised tht my behavior changed eversince i start work. Da dua kali u mention tht i besar kepale, i pijak atas kepale u. I tak tahu y i jadi mcm gini. Frankly speaking, i sendiri takut dgn my perangai. Sebab tu i cry non stop. The sense of fear and insecurity is huge. And bcoz of it kite asyik gaduh.
Thts y i took the ring off, to reflect and fikir balik, kalau ape i buat ni i btul yakin dgn diri i, kalau i yakin i blh jage hati my future husband. U sendiri tahu, tht it is not easy to jage isi hati org.
Its not abt u, its abt me. Wht u kate tadi memang btul. U did the right thng to tegur me. I btul bersyukur tht im with someone yg btul2 can lead me correctly.
I harap you tak fikir lain, i harap u kasi i xplain. Mcm tadi, i kasi u xplain, nw, pls let me xplain.
U suroh me blg u, tapi u tak nak dgr ke?
I paham u binget, tapi dgr dulu my reason. Then u judge me k."
"The feeling is how u rase bile u tahu ape kekurangan dlm diri kalau u bandingkan diri u, dgn diri org yg lebih berpangkat, lebih mewah.
I hope u just let me xplain. I bukan buat gini pasal i nak cari sebab to go with other guys. Kalau i btul2 niat mcm gi2, siang2 i da lari kan diri."
"Mama u ok?
Dry yr tears mama
Papa always beside mama.papa help mama k. papa tak leave mama alone.papa love mama so much.dis is d time mama need papa."
Sometimes things do get complicate for us both. We're in different phase of our own lives. He's all grown up, struggling to find success in life by 40. While me, I've just stepped to this adult world, officially. Find the real person that I'll become when I reach his age, finding jobs and gaining experiences in life. It feels great and contented you have someone who can really lead you in life, but sometimes, I still find myself immature when i compare myself to him, like my thinking is still of a teen, while his thinking is adulthood, financial and family, work and commitment. Whereby me? All i think is njoying still, shop and travel around.
But he made a promise to me, which I felt touch and confident to go on and find my own self. I hope you mean what you say, and I believe every word you say. Because I don't think I'll find someone else who can really understand and able to read me, like how you can, inside out.
"Tonight will be night that I will fall for you. Over again. I won't live to see another day. A girl like you is impossible to find", Squadron.
I ♥ Squadron
10:03 PM
Headed to
Gloria Jean's with
Squadron for coffee and cakes. Was somewhat rather having good time before it all turned sour. Hehehe but glad did go out. Hehehe
Sunday, July 27, 2008
I ♥ Squadron
11:15 AM
There is so many kereks out there. I realised something. Everytime we're on the road, riding or basically speeding to rush for time, when I looked over my shoulder, I see a guy, or a girl looking and give us such faces. Like, 'What the hell?'. There was once, a super four tried to start a race with us, at the PIE. But please, we ride not for show, we ride for transport, and since we were blessed with a lil bit more, we decide to go for something we really like. I don't get it, why some people are so proud when they own a vehicle, or they can apply for a credit card. Because what I see is that, owning a car and a card, will put you on debt. If you're filthy rich, would you be in debt in the first place ey? I'm sure you'll be able to afford anything, with cold hard cash. Hehehe there are so many jokers out there.
Ouh please don't be mistaken, I'm not refering to anyone who owns a card, but I'm refering to those, who owns a card just to give a show off to the public. What a waste of wealth.
Saturday, July 26, 2008
I ♥ Squadron
11:59 PM
The weekend, I'm not bugging in office, butting in office, nor snoring in office. Went to Downtown to book a chalet for my upcoming getaway from the hustle and bustle of city life. Hehehe it'll be one long weekend, and one good rest, I hope.
Drop by Sahak's mum's place, to witness the sister's solemnisation. Of course, we didn't really get to see the whole scenario. Hehehe
Headed to
Mustafa for some grocery shopping and inner clothings for
Squadron. Tried on a Puma top, which
Squadron commented nice, but then, there were overdosed of love tyre, so I bypass ey. Got to start tying up shoe laces and start momenting back again. Sigh
Nevertherless, we still had hotdogs for the
Prom Night. Hehehe, movie's pretty emotional, tho it's not that rational. Ouh well, got home therafter. Hehehe
Friday, July 25, 2008
I ♥ Squadron
11:59 PM
It really feels so good, to come home 5pm on a Friday. It's been long since I didn't do any OTs, or stucked with report. Hehehe
Supposed to be going out, rather than stay at home.
Squadron's got a call from his office, for emergency and he stayed there till 0000. Hahha, of course, I was soundly asleep, all dressed up, like going on for a date. Hahahaha
Tuesday, July 22, 2008
I ♥ Squadron
11:59 PM
I'm in the midst of planning for
Aug 27, then I realised, I don't even know where to start. It's a two day event, but seriously, my planning mind doesn't seem to synchronise well anymore.
To begin with, is the birthday gift. This old man is pretty fickle minded. One end, he says he wants the
Adidas, the next he wants
Crumpler. Got a list of items that I can add to the gift. But I seriously don't know where to start. The
Nautica shirt and the
Zara top, not to mention the
Adidas watch.
Dinner. I've yet to find a good restaurant for this occasion, since he did mentioned, that for special dates, he would love to dine. We've been to Carousel, and I'm outta list of halal restaurants on hand. So far, I've got
StraitsKitchen in Hyatt with the smart casual dress code,
Larissa Cafe@ Orchard Hotel Shopping Arcade,
Tiffany Cafe & Restaurant @ Furama City Centre,
La Vela Restaurant @ Keppel Clubhouse,
Samar Middle Eastern @ Bali Lane,
Senses Patisserie @ Marina Mandarin,
The Courtyard Chocolate @ Fullerton.
I think it's better that I go solo on foot and have a look at all the restaurants first hand, see if it matches the occasion for two. Considering the location we be from, I'm thinking of La Vela at Keppel Clubhouse. Then again, don't know the atmosphere.
I'm thinking of planning for a day of scuba with him, or maybe organise for some water venture sports. Or just simply head out to the flyer and just gaze at the scenery from up high.
Darn, don't wish for this to be a glitch. It's not like everyday you turn 33. And I know he deserve this to be made unforgettable. We're both taking 2 days off from work, time to relax, enjoy and unwind.
Sunday, July 20, 2008
I ♥ Squadron
11:59 PM
With just a mere sleep of 3 hours, we then headed out again. Hehehe
Spent the whole day at
ECP, feeling the breeze and then sun on our pale skin as yet again. In the midst of appreciating nature, we came with yet, another
'human nature'. A couple having heavy I say,
'human activity' in the middle of the grass, on the public stoned table. Well, I'm sure they are aware of the surroundings, but then, I don't know what in the world are they thinking, displaying a public
'porno'. If the rain didn't come, I guess they'll be immersed in their public relations for long.
Set that disturbing view aside, there was a car boot sale event. Didn't get anything from there tho, but the items sold are pretty much interesting. After couple hours more of snoring, we then headed home with lazy feets, as tomorrow is
MONDAY!!
Saturday, July 19, 2008
I ♥ Squadron
11:59 PM
Gave up fighting lah, we decided to just meet up and head out.
Squadron joined in that boring office, with him playing his sniper game, and me having solo movie marathon with
College Road Trip,
Forgetting Sarah Marshall and
Over Her Dead Body. The updated movie in office comp is of to my personal liking. Hehehe, there is still so much more to watch!
Feasted with sushi while heading off to Cathay to book tixs to
Dark Knight before heading to Zam Zam for dinner. There were too much of food to take that we both had some personal issues with our own bodies and feet to walk that much distance taking train rides. Hehehe it feels great for a change sometimes to take a train. Had a short detour to the arcade in Bugis, before then running for the 1am movie. Dark Knight's overall an awesome movie, it lasted for about 180mins.
Headed back to office to get my Prada before heading home. Hehehe
Friday, July 18, 2008
I ♥ Squadron
6:34 PM
There are points of time, when tho how strong your relationship is, how much fun and serious you are in the relationship, it takes just a gentle reminder, or a simple thought to either break, or strengthen your knot.
Even husbands and wives needs constant reminder, to how much they are loved, and how important they are in each other's life. The reminiscene to time of courtship would somehow, rekindle the love that was once so strong, fun and much needed.
After ever fight that
Squadron and me have, then starts to learn more about maintaining a relationship. It's not easy tho, especially when things start to be more serious, when you both start to be more busy. But what I learn, that constant reminder, to why you choose your partner, will be helpful. Somehow, you'll think more wisely to choosing the right man. Wouldn't it be great, if our love ones tell us how important and loved we are towards them everytime? In life, feeling that you are loved and important will make yourself feel appreciated, like said, One of the secrets of a happy life is continuous small treats. Not just physical things, emotional things too.
I'm glad sometimes we have fights, cause then, it makes you learn more, and understand more of the person you are with, and how serious he actually is with you. Sometimes, when you are having fun, you'll neglect seriousness, which may lead to astray feelings.
One way or another, I still
♥ my a decade plus three years difference man (=
Monday, July 14, 2008
I ♥ Squadron
10:57 PM
Counting down to
Aug 27. I have 44 days more, to plan, decide, buy and save cash for
Squadron's upcoming 33th. Got the venue, but am thinking of the gift. Just pray that he won't be getting himself that Adidas bag end of this month, so that I can gift it for him, plus maybe the nice top from Zara that he adore, and maybe arcade spree, plus a personalized cake and card, and either a nice restaurant dinner, or self-fixed dinner.
But then, I'm still cracking, what else can I get him, plus how shall I decorate the venue? Think..
ThiNK.. THINK....
Sunday, July 13, 2008
I ♥ Squadron
7:23 AM
While
Squadron went to visit Raihan, which I of course didn't tag along due to the flu that I'm still having, I decided to be the only girl and head out with the 3 amigos, Fy, Has and Farhan. Well, apparently, when you are with guys, they tend to like, erm, do things guys would do.
Feasted at
Popeye's T3, which is to my suprise, Fy's and Farhan's first visit. Has the sick boy joined along, and we toured around T3, as caveman Fy and stoneman Farhan has never been to. They were looking at salegirls, from
Blush! to
Body Shop, from
Cafe to
BookStores. It's a lucky that I don't fulfill their wishes to help them get the chicks' numbers, coz they ended up spoting 6 hot chicks in total.
Came to pass by
Goldheart jewellery, which I drag Fy to look at rings with me. Hehehe and I admit, we both have the same taste. Fell so in love with that one ring, which gave a new abstract look, but the diamond's total beauty. Didn't check the price tho, but as promised by
Squadron, we will visit the shop to take a look at the ring soon. Hehehe
So us 3 amigos plus me gogos, headed to T1 just to ride skytrain to T2, which by the way, we can directly head to T2 from T3 by skytrain. Viewing mall a lil before heading to
Gloria Jean's, which I indulged in the free flow of caramel sauce and choco syrup. As suggested by Fy, that next time when we coffee, I shall just order whipped cream and indulge myself in the sauces. Hehehe
Squadron came fetching me, and we rode to
Expo, for some food festival. Didn't get much from there, but found yet another
caricature artist.
Headed to
Carrefour at Suntec, but couldn't get what we were looking for, so headed back to
Giant at Tamps, and got the outdoor gears we were looking for.
Mama, nanti one day we go and have a look at the ring kay?
Really? Hehehe yay! Really like the ring. Somehow, never seen the design before.
Insyallah kay, we will go hunt for a ring for you.
Okay.
How much do you think it'll cost?
Don't know, maybe $500?
Haiz, terkopak duitku. HeheheHehehe.. I'm soo looking forward to ring-hunt and next weekend!!
Saturday, July 12, 2008
I ♥ Squadron
11:59 PM
How wonders can sleeping in the office be. Camped in office, with practically being a loner. The office somehow is pretty scary at times, but as usual, with my wild imaginations, even in an amusement park can make it scary. How amusing.
So late lunch at CP with
Squadron. Back to office to change and then headed back out to
Taka, to look for gift for newborn Raihan. Kids clothings can be such adore, tho expensive, but the outlook of the kid is important to me. It reflects how much parents are willing to spend on their kids, how much they love, pamper and how they teach their kids of life. Anyway, settled with
Oskosh B'Gosh rompers, that looks super adorable.
Somehow, our feets brought us to a food festival at the basement. Tho it's non-Halal, now then I realised, how much variety of food that we can easily get. So, we settled for puddings from Cold Storage instead, of course, which we then smuggled into the movies. Well, now I know the real reason why
Squadron physco me to get that Chloe beg.
Head to
Cathay for movie, but the timings were a bore. Next good timing would be 3.20am. Headed to the public computer, and booked tickets for HellBoy at 1.15am at
Downtown east instead. Rushed home to change, before heading back on the road to movies.
Hellboy! I slept for the last hour in the movie. I guess work has drained down my energy, plus all the walking and touring. But the movie, was good,
apart from my snores. As rated from
Squadron. Hehehe headed home therafter.
Friday, July 11, 2008
I ♥ Squadron
11:59 PM
Been on sick leave for 3 days. Down with flu and bad headache, not to mention sore throat and non-energetic body, being overworked sometimes, well, it pays you off tho with cash, it pays you off with energy too.
Headed out to
Cineleisure to catch
Hancock at 1am with
Squadron. Had KFC for dinner while waiting for the movie. Then only I realised, how much this Squadron has always been overworked, but his body managed to sustain all the hardwork and exhaustion from work, and still be as energetic as ever when he's around me. So the Hancock was pretty good, tho it does quite has a funny ending. Came home thereafter.
Monday, July 07, 2008
I ♥ Squadron
11:59 PM
Super Mondayy!
Rushed back home to change and ride my way to Marina Square. Didn't manage to get a gift for newborn Raihan, as the shops were practically closing for the day the moment I stepped into the mall. So, headed to Royal Sporting instead to look for pump shoes that Squadron wanted to get for me. After much roaming and trying, from Diesel I headed on to Puma section.
Me: Hmm, which is nicer? Puma, or Diesel?
Squadron: Both is nice, one sporty, one lady. To your own comfort
Me: Hmm. Then how? Both is comfortable. And nice. Hehehe
Squadron: Hmm, then get both. Since you don't even have a decent pump.
Me: Really? Tak overbudget ke?
Squadron: Nak ke tak nak?
And I took both shoes and treat him to Andersen's.
And our traditional
popeye supper. Hehehe
Headed home with a hearty heart. hehehe ouh I got two shoes two new shoes, which he abandoned his want of that adidas bag.. My wishlist is heard!
Kay Squadron, promise I'll get that bag for you kay, juussst you waiitt... Hehehe
Sunday, July 06, 2008
I ♥ Squadron
10:21 PM
Aiza' engagement was today. Just a small celebration to accomadate close relatives on her engagement. Got herself a makeup artist from RZ Diana. I must say, that the kebaya is gorgeous and the makeup is good.
Headed to Adi's place for mini feast before heading home straight to bed. Hehehe
Saturday, July 05, 2008
I ♥ Squadron
11:59 PM
Work was a drag for me today. Jammed packed myself with flu, sore throat and terrible headache to sustain all those silly users who work and asks stupid questions on weekends. Sigh.. Dad fetched me for lunch, but ended up, couldn't feed myself any of those food. Movie marathon for a moment, being half dead before
Squadron joined me in that boring office.
Headed to
Vivo to look for loads of items, but couldn't get a decent top. Movie seats were a bore, so we rode off to Cathay instead. Got myself a beautiful Chloe leather handbag for 40% less.Hehehe
Ice cream fiesta at
B&J's before wrestling at the seats waiting for
It's a Boy Girl Thing. Movie was amazing, but as per normal, I fell asleep 30mins to the end of the movie.
Squadron's comfy arms brought me to sanity, and I guess the flu was taking over me. Rode home half dead after. Hehehe
Souvenior for Squadron. Hehehe
Friday, July 04, 2008
I ♥ Squadron
11:59 PM
Overtime duty today has brought me down shagged. I don't know how many users I've help, but it sures drained me out for good.
Squadron fetch me off to
PS. Got a kimono top for work from Bysi. Off to
Cathay for tickets to Wanted, then back to late dinner at Mac's. Only to then, we both realised we're one shagedellic. Hehehe 30mins to the end of the movie, I fell into great comfort of undistrubed sleep. Hehehe I guess
Squadron arm sutty comfy, and a good sub for pillows! Hehehe
Halfway thru the journey home, my dearest
Squadron's GP attitude drop by, he rode in total madness - Low cornering and he made a mark of 20m long of skidded tyre marks.
I know, your dream is to race, but please, least warn me of the crazy ride, can?!
Thursday, July 03, 2008
I ♥ Squadron
8:17 PM
PS to collect our couple ring.
The turnout of laser engraving was a satisfaction.
Hehehe midnight supper at kallang
KFC, before heading to
Mustafa to get few items. Headed home therafter (=
Wednesday, July 02, 2008
I ♥ Squadron
11:59 PM
To my dearest, be it a guy or a girl who tries to tore the happiness, steal hearts or physco the mind, I'll always be true. We've planned so much for the future ahead, that's what I'm waiting for. I know, sometimes you feel competitived by my peers, but to me, I know what I want, and you have it all in you. Tho people may still talk about us, thinking wrongly of us, and simply want to break us, I hope you still remember that one precious kiss, that one ocean view, and that one heartfelt promise. Because nothing in my heart has changed, but to grow. And remember, I'm waiting for that day when you say the vow and place the ring on my finger (=
And to the guy and the girl, please, I don't wish for much involvement in your relationship. We know you have something in your wicked mind, we're not playing your game. We'll make you regret of your own game.
Tuesday, July 01, 2008
I ♥ Squadron
11:20 PM
Headed to Starbucks for some catching up with Ayid. There seems to be aload of changes, but no updates. A lil weird and coincidence, he mentioned that he just patch back with his ex (Syakilah) after 9months of separation/falling in love, and after he found out the main reason of the breakup - Girl's down with cancer. It's a lil deceiving with the fiction that doesn't tally with facts. Nevertheless, did managed to give him few advices. Headed home thereafter.
